What Is Self-Confidence? Does It Come Naturally?

Every parent wants their child to have their own identity and self-confidence. For children, self-confidence means social and emotional maturity, knowing their own and someone else’s limits, communication skills, being open to criticism and ability to create solutions. Unfortunately many parents mistake being limitless, lack of respect to others and lack of control of behaviors with self-confidence.

From the early stages of infancy, responsibilities of mothers and fathers are quite important to build the feeling of confidence. Fulfilling basic needs, unconditional love and acceptance create the very first steps of a strong parent-child relationship. Unlike the general assumption, self-confidence evolves with time according to parents’ attitude and social environment.

What can be done to build self-confidence?

These are what you must do to build a stronger communication with them and increase their self-esteem;

  • Every child is unique. They are not like each other, even though they are siblings.
  • Respecting diversities, not compering one to another would raise their awareness of their own abilities.
  • Maintaining eye contact while communicating,
  • Choosing words appropriate to their age, letting them to express themselves
  • Showing respect to their feelings,
  • Spending time together,
  • Giving constructive criticism.

Parents always should pay attention to be consistent and honest. Inconsistent behaviors of parents can cause children to question their own sufficiency. Respect is the key of the communication; accepting them as individuals and noticing their rights would make them feel important.

Parents’ expectation level should be compatible to child’s capacity and age. Children who are allowed to have their own experiences grow with a more healthy self-confidence. Parents also should pay attention if school authorities and teachers show same attitude. Self-esteem is established in family, but school’s responsibilities are protecting and increasing it. If children are suffering from disagreements with classmates, low grades or anything else, teachers should be capable to solve problems in a pedagogically healthy way.

What is the difference between children with high and low self-esteem?

Children with low self-esteem, raised by over protective or oppressive parents, usually have trouble in social life. They worry deeply about separating from mother, expect approval all the time and are unwilling to solve their own problems. They can’t tolerate competition with peers and are unsuccessful about being a part of a social circle. Since they trouble making decisions, they prefer to be close to adults who make life easier for them. It is also usually seen that children with low self-esteem have troubles with their mother in older ages.

What is the influence of self-confidence on children?

Children with low self-confidence suffer from inability to fit in; they display socially unacceptable behaviors. They can’t be satisfied with peer relations and are tend to feel unsuccessful, unworthy. Since they have high level of worry, they have less concentration in compare to their classmates. It also can be observed that their performance in academic fields are lower than their classmates, due to lack of concentration and confidence that they can be successful.

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